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(no subject) [Jun. 12th, 2005|07:59 pm]
[Current Mood |creativecreative]
[Current Music |lovers and friends-- usher..]

Gentlemen, why don't you laugh? With the fearful strain that is upon me night and day, if I did not laugh, I should die.
- Abraham Lincoln

"If a man does his best, what else is there?"
- General George S. Patton (1885-1945)

"Not everything that can be counted counts, and not everything that counts can be counted."
- Albert Einstein (1879-1955)

"Only two things are infinite, the universe and human stupidity, and I'm not sure about the former."
- Albert Einstein (1879-1955)

"A lie gets halfway around the world before the truth has a chance to get its pants on."
- Sir Winston Churchill (1874-1965)

"The full use of your powers along lines of excellence."
- definition of"happiness" by John F. Kennedy (1917-1963)

"Do, or do not. There is no 'try'."
- Yoda ('The Empire Strikes Back')

"The only difference between me and a madman is that I'm not mad."
- Salvador Dali (1904-1989)

"If you can't get rid of the skeleton in your closet, you'd best teach it to dance."
- George Bernard Shaw (1856-1950)

what is wrong with all these old quotes? i know i know-- they are right!
just some food for thought!
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(no subject) [Jun. 12th, 2005|06:09 am]
[Current Mood |tiredtired]

damned survey thingies:
1) Starting time: 5:31 am
2) Full name: Marie Jaclyn (jack-lynn) Oberski
3) Nick names: MO, MJ, Panzcki yes like the doughnut
4) School: Northwood University
5) Email: marieoberski@yahoo.com, marzipan04@aol.com, marie_zkitties@excite.com
6) Eyes: hazel
7) Height: 5'4ish
8) Siblings: NONE
9) Ever been kissed: who hasn’t?
10) Ever been cheated on: yes
11) Ever missed school because it was raining: I think everyone has at one time or another
12) Ever faked sick: yeah who likes to take tests
13) Ever taken a picture for someone random: all the time I work at a restaurant
14) Ever had an imaginary friend: No
15) Ever wanted to hook up with a friend: Yes
16) Ever cried during a flick: yes
17) Who is your celebrity crush? : dunno I really like eathan hawke
18) Ever hid under a chair: maybe when I was little but not lately
19) Favorite drink: mt. dew and bud light—what’s water?
20) Favorite food: italian or greek
21) Favorite colour(s) : pink, pink, and pink
22) Summer or Winter: of the two summer
23) Spring or Autumn: autumn
24) Music or dancing: Music, you can sing with it no matter how bad you are
25) Online or Offline: what does that mean?
26) Lace, silk, or satin: ok is this sheets, underwear, what is this material making up?
27) Like anyone: well yeah!
28) Who have you known the longest out of your friends: Jess
29) Who is your shyest friend: umm what is shy? None of my friends are shy
30) Who is your loudest friend: Mike
31) Who do you go to for advice: Amber and Mike there are a few others but those two know me the best so I go to them first
32) Who do you get along with: everyone unless you piss me off
33) In the last two weeks have you cried: yeah—over moving and losing what I have worked so hard for
34) In the last two weeks have you been mean: I know I have but not necessarily intentionally
35) In the last two weeks have you been happy: why wouldn’t I be
36) In the last two weeks have you been sarcastic: not in the slightest- ha
37) In the last two weeks have you been yelled at: always!
38) In the last two weeks have you called someone you have a crush on: of course
39) In the last two weeks have you kissed someone: oh yeah
40) In the last two weeks have you hugged somone: yes once again
41) In the last two weeks have you talked to yourself: umm yeah I contemplate things a lot and sometimes you just need to think them out loud to see if what you are saying sounds good
42) In the last two weeks have you wished upon a star: funny thing-- yes
43) In the last two weeks have you laughed until you cried: don’t think so—“I need a towel to take a picture”
44) In the last two weeks have you played truth or dare: no not in 4th grade
45) In the last two weeks have you played hide and seek: that could be fun but no
46) In the last two weeks have you gone to the beach at night: no but I really want to have someone take me and really make it special ;)
47) In the last two weeks have you walked in a forest : umm maybe to pee
48) In the last two weeks have you read a book: a book? No but the paper yes
49) Are you lonely: sometimes
50) Are you happy: with what myself, life, in general—yea I guess so depends on what you are talking about
51) Are you talking to someone online: no
52) Do you believe in God/the Devil: not so much anymore
53) Do you believe in love: YES YES YES
54) Do you believe in The Closet Monster: like people that won’t come out of the closet – NO haha
55) Do you believe in the monster under the bed: no
56) Do you believe in heaven/hell: heaven doesn’t want me and hell can’t handle me so—I guess not
57) Do you beleive in superstitions: like if you step on a crack you break your mothers back? Why would I; karma is easier to understand
58) Do you believe in half empty or half full: half empty and who has been drinking it?
60) Favorite quote: can’t think of one right off the top of my head
61) When was the last time you showered: Saturday morning at about 10 am
62) What is the last thing you said online: ttyl hun miss ya
64) What is your computer: gateway!
65) What was the last thing you did: put on PJ’s
66) Where do you want to go on your honeymoon: Hawaii or some place that I have never been before
67) Where do you want your wedding: depends on the season but hopefully outside
68) Where do you want to be buried: i would like to be cremated and take whatever organs needed
69) How's the weather: nice- 72 and not muggy anymore
70) How's your grass: green but I don’t take care of it the complex does
71) Thing you find attractive about the opposite: personality, eyes, sense of humor
72) How do YOU eat an Oreo: one side the filling then the other side
73) Favorite TV shows: King of Queens, Simpsons, and Family Guy
74) Favorite site: anything interesting
75)What do you want to be when you grow up: I’m never going to grow up there is no fun in it
76) favorite station: ummm I have a few: 102.5, 93.3, 94.5, and 107.1 when it comes in
77) Favorite band: umm there are a lot of them sorry not picking one
78) Favorite chocolate bar: don’t really like chocolate but snickers if I had to choose
79) Favorite country: US I live here for crying out loud
80) Favorite days of the week: Thursday
81) Favorite animal: look at the username—hello a cat!
82) Favorite Store: pac sun, be you, buckle, and Victoria secret
83) If you could change your name it would be? Autumn maybe I don’t know
84) Do you sleep with a stuffed animal: yes but only because it was from a special someone
85) The stupidest thing you have ever done?: I don’t know I do a lot of dumb things
86) Favorite CD: Rascal Flatts—but just for the moment
87) Moon or the Sun: sun it’s beautiful
88) Fire or water: catch 22--- water it is good for you
89) Favorite number: 4, 42, 11
90) What are you listening to right now: VH1
91) On the phone or in person: in person it means more
92) lust or love: isn’t love lust at some point or another
93) If you could change something about you it would be: don’t want to change anything
94) When's your birthday: 8-21-84
95) Do you have pets: 3 cats- duke, chip, raja and 1 bird- tweetie
96)Who sent this to you: umm took it from amber
97) What do you think about this person: she is my bestfriend and I know that she would do anything for me if I needed her to and I would do the same for her! She is very outgoing and optimistic and that keeps me going! Thank you!
98) What time is it now? 6:06 am
99) Anything you want to say to everyone: I’m tired—enjoy your summer and be safe—happy birthday to all those summer birthdayers
100th question...? I thought this would never be over
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(no subject) [Jun. 11th, 2005|04:22 pm]
[Current Mood |disappointeddisappointed]
[Current Music |Highway to Hell]

alright guys i think this is one of the worst days of my life! yeah not only did i crash course myself on how to drive a manual but i was "let go" from my job and now i'm sitting at home thinking - FUCK! WHAT AM I GOING TO DO? also if you wanna know what happened call me don't ask over LJ!

My cousins wedding is on the 18th so i have to get ready for that!
I need to find a job-NOW!
I have an interview not in Michigan- thank god-- but i realized today that even if i did get offered the job i don't think i would go!- if you don't know why you're dumb!
No insurance- rent is due at the end of the month- i have bills to pay- and i feel as though i'm going crazy!!!
not taking summer classes now because i was trying to find another job in the first place-- GRRRRRRRR!

i just want to drink to my oblivion and forget today ever happened!! but on the other hand for once someone wants to take care of me-- but they're not here! how does that work?

it's really odd to have someone want to take care of you or say that they really care--- that's what meanse something not the "i love yous" not that they have been said but to show is better than to hear-- and as all this stuff is happening to me i realize that there is one person in my life that means the world to me and if i ever lost that i would be losing a huge part of myself as well-- i have learned from this person whether they think so or not but i have-- i have learned to come to grips with who i really am and that i don't need a drug or to smoke or to drink for that matter-- all i really need to do is hear that everything is ok from them and that it will work itself out and that "we" will get through this! this isn't even your problem and yet you are right there for me-- THANK YOU!!

ok enough because i could pour my heart out right now and that just wouldn't be good-- i need to figure out what i'm going to do on monday-- job search one more time!

by the way my mood is because of me ,i'm dissapointed in ME!
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(no subject) [Jun. 6th, 2005|08:12 pm]
[Current Mood |confusedconfused]
[Current Music |making memories of us-- keith urban]

alright so i've been thinking: yeah and we all know that isn't good!!

so do i move? all i want is to clear my head-- but what if i end up finding a job that i really like and pays well? then do i stay where ever it is that i'm going?

i'm scared-- there are two reasons that i don't want to go-- and yes they are people! i don't know if that is a good thing or if i'm just crazy-- crazy probably but who knows.

i care about something way too much to just get up and walk out on it.. i have been working way too hard on fixing it to not know what will happen with it..and yet on the other hand i hope this person would understand and in some way if they really want what i want then they would tell me that they don't want me to leave or that i just mean too much-- i know that i have put you through hell and i don't want to do that again... earlier today when you said that it may be a good thing for me i felt like you said that you wanted me to go and it brought me to tears,, uncontrolable tears at that-- i was driving and we all know that just isn't good all together-- i don't know what to think because i don't know where this is going and yet i don't think i want to know right now i love what we have! i know that i can go to you for anything and i hope you would come to me.........i need to know how you feel--plain and simple i'm sorry for asking but my heart needs to know not my mind!

why can't i let go is another question.... is it because i see things in the future? is it because i know what is right? is it because that's what i want to believe? what is it?

i can't walk out on my best friend-- amber i love you to death and if i leave to be quite honest i don't think we would even talk as much as we do now-- you're support means too much to me right now!

as for my parents shit they gave up on me a long time ago and there is one person that really knows that other than them-- the one thing that really mattered they took-- health insurance-- are you fuckin retarted-- ya'll know how much i get sick and all the allergy problems that i have-- who's parents in their right mind take that away from their child that they want to see succeed-- well at least that's what they tell your academic dean............ who the fuck do you think you are?

i don't understand help me out, throw me a freakin bone here, seriously if you can answer some of these questions do it i need all the help right now!!!!!

oh yeah-- beth i miss you sooo much!
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(no subject) [Jun. 1st, 2005|01:12 pm]
[Current Mood |peacefulpeaceful]
[Current Music |BYOB--System of a Down]

Amber: it was great seeing you yesterday and just to let you know you look soooo much better than you sound! that's a good thing :) i hope all the rest of the healing goes well--

Beth: amber is right if you come back with an accent we'll all kill you! haha no really i think everyone knows that you've got great potential and that this will be wonderful for you!! you better be back for my birthday-- or else i just might cry :)

ok so things definitally get talked about on car rides-- that is all i have to say about that because my life is mine and i really don't feel like sharing this-- ever! lol


oh by the way J.C. if you ever call me at 7:30 am again i will have to kill you--- grr but it was nice to hear from you!

love and kisses i need more sleep
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grrr! [May. 29th, 2005|02:53 am]
[Current Mood |contentcontent]
[Current Music |two steps behind-- def lepard]

why is it that i am always the sober person taking care of the drunk assholes? i wanna be the drunk asshole and party and have someone take care of me!!! other than that life is great the fighting has been brought down a notch and in my book that's great.. now if only this person could trust me 100% i would have not only a wonderful friendship but one hell of a relationship!! i'm sorry that i get jealous sometimes but everyone does and it just really urks me-- maybe one day you will see that; but you can't change someone they have to be willing to change for themselves!!!

hi mom! haha thought i might wanna put that in!
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(no subject) [May. 28th, 2005|12:40 am]
you wanna know what gets me? is when the guy you love is worrying about someone else! yes i have been drinking
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OKIE DOKIE [May. 27th, 2005|09:19 pm]
[Current Mood |enragedenraged]
[Current Music |HIGHWAY TO HELL]

so i got the most random phone call last night! yeah ummm not that i didn't want it but it was just unexpected--- i never realized how much one cared until last night when they asked me to come see them! i would love to hun!

ber: i know you are feeling better today and everyday will be the same and soon you will never know what happened and they'll just be there!

ya know i learned last night that people, when they are drunk that is, just don't know how to be humane.. they think that you are yelling at them when really you are just trying to explain yourself--
i'm not made of money and those of you who think i am-- yeah ya'll can f*ck off!
when i do something for someone it is out of the kindness of my heart-- guess what i can't do it anymore and i will not take being pushed around-- i can't stand it i'm not someone that you can order around! just because your gf puts up with it doesn't mean that i have to-- and i won't! hear me loud and clear I WILL NOT BE TREATED LIKE SHIT!
i have been shit on enough in my life and i know that everyone goes through it but i'm not dealing with it anymore i will stand my ground and confront you right away-- i know one person that will read this and think wtf happened when i was gone---- well the up side is i never said that i wanted to move in here i can't live with all those people in and out all the time second what i really said was my parents will not help me with rent if i move into a house! get your shit straight before you talk to others about it!

i'm pissed and sick of doing everything for everyone--- from now on there are only 4 people that i will do anything for and that is only if i'm asked and 2 are my parents so figure out the rest assholes and stay out of my life!
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LMAO [May. 26th, 2005|10:40 pm]
[Current Mood |crazycrazy]
[Current Music |let me go- 3 doors down]

Hey ya'll my phone is back on so hit me up!
Pete: I read your comment and no it was not pertaining to you; by thank you i apprecitate it- thank you!
Ok so the house that I wanted is gone and I can't do a damned thing about it! POOP!
Ber: I hope everything went well you have been on my mind all day-- hopefully mike and i are coming down tomorrow to see you that is if all goes as planned-- haha i got you kind of a gag gift too but i hope you like it and think of me whenever you see it-- maybe even put it on your beddieby
well other than that not much to say right now other than this past weekend my mom learned how to play beer pong that was an experience all in itself! wow!

good night world!
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what a night/morning [May. 17th, 2005|05:43 am]
[Current Mood |nauseatednauseated]
[Current Music |Holes- Rascal Flatts]

amber i can't wait to see you there is so much that i have to tell you!

HAPPY BIRTHDAY COREY! We salute you Mr. Mount Rushmore! hahahahaha
Nina, Corey, Mike (not who you think), Dave-- what a freakin night! all i have to say is thank you and i really want to go bowling assholes! maybe next time and i'm totally up for going up north on the 28th if i can get it off of work- i think it will be relaxing-- and i need it; ya'll know that!

so yeah i found out some stuff today that i'm not exactally happy with but i'm willing to let go as long as i can talk about it-- this may make me too nice but ya know what quit stringing me alone if you don't want anything-- please that's all i ask

There's three in the Hall from those PICTURES in the closet
Two in the bedroom from THAT NIGHT I LOST IT
And ONE DEEP INSIDE ME determined to stay

Holes in and around me I keep FALLING ABCK INTO
Holes dig in and surround me
God knows what I'm gonna do
To fill in these HOLES LEFT BY YOU
Left by you

I pour DRINK after DRINK but nothing hit bottom
The LOVE that we made still barely an echo
I'll try anything in these vacant hollow


There's two through my hands and one through my feet
From this cross that I bare to the day that I see
Its GUILT and its BLAME its SHAME and its LOVE
Seeking the TRUTH I dug them myself

All these holes dig in and surround me
God knows what I'm gonna' do
To fill up these holes left by you

you know what i admitted everything why couldn't you? take it from me: never wear your heart on your sleeve you'll only be hurt!

other than that i have not touched my head to a pillow yet so good night/morning and i'll see ya'll for breakfast later

"dude what the fuck happened to your car?"-- if you weren't there and didn't do it you'll never get it! LMAO
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